I recently read this blog post called “regret” over at Why Girls are Weird. I was instantly intrigued by the title of the blog. “Regret.” A common word among many, and a word that we hear often. It really got me thinking about my life. All the decisions that I have made, the mistakes I have made, the successes I have had. There have been highs, lows, sad times, and happy times.
When we share our stories with each other, a question that often comes up is “do you regret anything?” This is a question that a lot of people ask others, or think about even in their own life. I want to share you why I choose to not regret, regrets, and why I choose to tell people “no I do not regret the things that I have done.” Let me preface this by saying this. I may not be proud of all I have done, and some of the mistakes I have made have been bigger than others, but I will not regret any of them. Here is why.
EVERY MISTAKE MADE HAS TAUGHT A LESSON
You, like me, have made mistakes. I know you have because you are human, and humans are not perfect. We are far from it. You have done things in your life that you probably look back on and think “what was I thinking!” – trust me, I do that sometimes, too. The answer is often “I have no idea,” but what I do know is there is a lesson in every bad or good decision made.
All we have done has only brought more insight into life, more wisdom on the topic, and a resiliency to get up and keep going. Every decision made has only brought us further along in our journeys, equipping us for what is to come. That does not mean that we could have not gotten here without making those mistakes, but they have caused us to think differently, see others differently, and ultimately made us stronger. Not only have they taught lessons, they have also given insight into what others may be facing allowing us to speak encouragement into their life.
EVERY MISTAKE MADE HAS BEEN USED FOR GOOD
People who are perfect are not relate-able. Thank God that no one is perfect. Every mistake, every decision, good or bad, has been used for good in some way. I have gone through heart-ache, I have gone through dealing with pain, I have endured making very bad decisions, and had to learn to deal with the consequences. All of those moments have been used. I have had countless conversations where I was able to say “I have been where you are.” or “I know how it feels to go through this” I have been able to speak life into others lives, because of the mistakes,and decisions I have made. Although it may have hurt at the time, looking back it allowed me to relate to others, and understand in a deeper way HOW they feel. It allowed to me to understand their tears, cry with them, and get down on their level because I have been there.
You are unique, you have faced things that I may not have faced, and because of that you are able to help people that I may never be able to help. Every situation in our life. Every good, and bad moment we have endured can be used for good IF we let it.
You currently may be in the midst of your pain. You may be going through something that is painful beyond words. I promise you – you will get through this, and this situation that you are facing can be used, if you allow it. You will be able to relate to someone in a way that others will not, because you have been there. Do not look back on your life with regret. Look back on your life with joy for how far you have come. Allow the bad and the good to be used to help others, relate to others, and most importantly teach you lessons. Allow these moments to grow you, shape you, and make you stronger.
I am sure you have heard the quote “everything happens for a reason” — well I am not sure how I feel about that, but I am sure about this
“things happen, and the reasons I may not know, but what I do with it is my choice”
How I chose to carry this into my future is my decision, and mine alone. It is not about the mistakes that we make, it is what we do with them that matters. You can learn a lot about a persons character, and strength in how they handle challenging situations that arise. When I look back on my life, think of all I have done, the person I am, and was, I want to be proud of how far I have come, and not all I have done wrong.
What person are you? Are you living with regret, and letting that be weight that you carry around every day? Or are you a person that has made mistakes, learned the lessons, and is living each day as a new day? A person who is making new decisions, and trying to be wiser the next time. A person who is allowing their situation to help them relate to others, and have genuine empathy with where they are at, because you have been there.
This is why I choose not to regret, regret. I do not want to walk through the rest of my life with guilt, burden, and regret. I am only 26, and that would make life very long. I want to live my life with intention, wisdom, and experience. Making good decisions when possible, and learning from the bad ones.
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